Aleena’s story

Aleena had just started her first year at the University of Leeds in when she did a one-day Grit workshop

I felt all over the place. I was learning a whole new discipline and there was so much to do. I was finding it difficult to keep up with lectures because they were still online. And thanks to Covid it was the first time I had studied for exams since school and it felt very, very different. It was difficult just to keep going. It was like my work-life balance was about to tip over.

I couldn’t tell my family. I didn’t want them to be disappointed or worry about me. I felt I had to keep up appearances. I thought it must be just me. It was lonely.

Lack of motivation was a big issue. I was struggling with the discipline of getting down to watch all the lectures. Then I would be very hard on myself because I was giving up so easily. I felt guilty for not being good enough. I was always comparing myself to the others and they seemed to be doing much better. You call it Imposter Syndrome? Yes, that’s exactly right!

I was really nervous before the Grit intensive. Right up to the morning before I was having second thoughts. But I went anyway, even though I didn’t know what it was all about. I was at the point of giving anything a go.

Grit resonated in so many ways. Hearing people share their stories, I realised that pretty much everyone seemed to be doing much better than they actually were. People on different courses, people from all over the university, we were all going through the same experience. It wasn’t just me!

It was such a relief to talk with people who understood. We talked about how it was our own inhibitions that were getting in the way, how they were hindering us, were stopping us achieve our potential. It all sort of crystalised when we talked about “speaking from I.” When ‘we’ want to, when ‘we’ should do, becomes ‘I’ am going to.  By putting it into words you manifest it.

I feel like I’ve made life-long friends through Grit. After the workshop six of us set up a Group Chat called “Accountability” where talk about worries, the stresses of university life. We chat every week. We set goals every week. And we hold each other accountable for achieving our goals.

I have these post-it notes that say what it is I’m going to do the next day. They are a really great way of motivating myself, driving myself. They help me keep on top of things. They map out short term and long term goals.  So, instead of trying to make huge leaps that I’m never going to make in one go, now I’ve just got a series of steps, the stages of the journey, little targets to keep me improving.

If wasn’t for Grit I’d still be finding some excuse for not getting things done. I’d still be blaming external factors, the situation, other people for doing so well. I’d even still be blaming ‘Imposter Syndrome.’ But now I am accountable. I am more focused, more determined, more disciplined, more motivated. It’s all down to me. And that is just brilliant.